Jaundice

The day we came home from the hospital they delivered a phototherapy blanket, they are nice, you put it on them and dress them, you can hold them, and do whatever. the next day, the called and said they brang me the wrong kind. I was pretty upset, the bed, you have to leave them on there, unless they are eating, and you are not suppose to have a blanket on them but as you can see I have one acting like a belt, because it makes him feel alittle more secure. And for all of those who don't know me, I am anti-Binky..... but I give it to him, because I feel so badly for him....Yesterday the levels went up 5 points. So Today they will decide whether he needs to be in the hospital or not. I am so sad about that. They would do a blood transfusion, and that makes me so scared. But his eyes are looking so horrible, I now want them to put him in the hospital because I don't want anything to happen to him.... I love him so much already, and my family does too I would never forgive myself, if I put my selfishness before his health, meaning--I want to be able to hold him all the time, I want to bond with him, nurse him whenever, and just put my worries before him, but I know If he goes, it will be for the best. And I will live there with him, to feed,( because I am way to full, I feel like I am getting Mastitis,(yea can't spell it). Anyway I will post the journey..... later... My friend also had her baby the day after mine, and he was early, he is in the hospital, and not eating well, pray for hers and mine...... love ya all